A Partner in Paradise

Once upon a time there was an old southern preacher who happened to be moderator of the state association. He was a pretty conservative old fellow, and he didn’t believe in women being allowed to speak in the church. Well, it so happened that a woman got up and wanted to address the meeting. The old preacher pounded his gavel and said “Sister, you’re out of order - the Bible says that women shouldn’t speak in the church, so I must ask you to please sit down.”

The woman was indignant. “Why of all the nerve!” she cried. “Where would you men be if weren’t for us women?”

The old preacher looked over his glasses and said, “We’d still be in the Garden of Eden, sister.”

When we last visited Adam, he was in the Garden of Eden, but he was there alone. He was single. He was living in this incredibly beautiful lush natural paradise—but in one respect, it was actually a wilderness. It was a relational wilderness because there was nobody else there to share it with him. And that was a problem.

It was a problem because Adam was made in God’s image. That means that Adam—and all of us, as human beings—share certain things in common with God. Now we know from the Bible that God is relational. This is one of the things that is true of God’s nature. God is always reaching out and getting involved with others; helping others; loving others. He thrives on interpersonal contact.

Even within his own Person, there is a relational dynamic as the three members of the Trinity relate to one another. So relationship is a fundamental part of God’s makeup. And because it’s part of His makeup, it’s part of our makeup, because we bear His image. (And by the way, if you are moving away from being involved with other people, you are moving away from expressing God’s character.)

So here is Adam, made in the image of God, but he has no opportunity for relationship with others of his own kind because he is the only human being on planet earth. Is God aware of this situation? You bet he is. Look at…

Genesis 2:18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

Up until this point in the book of Genesis, we read that God looked at what he had made and saw that it was good. Nine times he says that creation is good. Until he sees that Adam is alone and he says “Here is something that is not good, so I’m going to do something about it.”

What is the most important lesson of life that we need to learn? It is that God knows our needs, and He has the answer to our needs if we are just willing to wait on Him.

What was Adam’s need? He needed a companion. And God knew his need. So he did something about it. What did he do? He created a woman.

Have you ever wondered why God didn’t just create another man? Why did God create a woman? The answer is that man apart from woman is incomplete. The key is in those two words in verse 18—“helper suitable”. (KJV - help meet).

In Hebrew, the word for “helper” is the word “ezer”. It comes from a Hebrew root that means to surround and protect. And interestingly, the word “ezer” is often used in the OT to refer to God Himself. There are many verses that tell us that God is our helper, our protector, the one who surrounds us and shelters us and defends us. God is like a mother bear defending her cubs, or a hen gathering her chicks under her wings.

There is something in a woman that is very protective.

C.S. Lewis once said “If your dog bites a neighbor’s child, would you rather face the mother or the father to discuss the issue?” One of the great strengths of a woman is that she desires to shield and to protect her husband and her children. And in that way, she is expressing a part of God’s character that the man by himself does not possess.

Now the word “suitable” in verse 18 is the Hebrew word “kenegdo”, and it means to be a counterpart—to be corresponding and complementary, but to be different.

Think of a jigsaw puzzle. You always have to begin a jigsaw puzzle by finding two pieces that fit next to each other. They’re not the same shape. They’re not the same size. They’re not the same color. But they fit together, because they are “kenegdo”—they are corresponding. And when you put them together, you get a bigger picture than either of those pieces could give on its own.

That’s why God created a woman to be Adam’s companion, not another man. Her differences from him are what make her fit together so perfectly with him.

One of the great errors of our culture, and many other cultures down thru history, has been the homosexual approach to this whole question of companionship and relational needs.

The homosexual has said “I believe that I can find the answer to my inner needs in a relationship with someone of my own sex.” That’s what the word homosexual means—same sex.

But that solution to the problem is completely different from God’s solution to the problem in Genesis 2. God created a man. He knew that that man had a need for companionship and intimacy and relationship, so he created a woman—a human being of a different sex—to meet that need.

So the homosexual movement finds itself in disagreement with God’s action at that point. They have decided to disregard God’s solution, and “strike out on their own” in a different direction. And that can only lead to frustration and disappointment.

Genesis 2:18 teaches us that Adam’s desire was foreseen by God. Verses 19-20 tell us that Adam’s desire was fostered by God.

Genesis 2:19 Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found.

Here was a great project that God gave Adam to do. Name all the animals. Can you imagine! Remember, the act of naming was very significant in the Bible. If you named someone, it indicated that you had a special relationship with that person. That could also apply to animals.

The same is true today. A lot of you have pets. You give your pets names. Why? To indicate that they are yours, that you have a special bond with them.

Now in the Bible, names were very carefully chosen for their meaning. Because a name was meant to express something of the fundamental character of that person or that thing. For example, Jesus gave Simon the nickname Peter, which meant “rock”. Now at first, Peter was anything like a rock—he was more like sand when he denied the Lord and ran away. But under God’s grace, Peter became like a rock, and he became a foundation stone for the church.

So I think that when God brought all of the animals to Adam for him to name, what he really wanted Adam to do was to get to know these animals—to observe their habits, to study their behavior, so that he could give them names that would be appropriate to their character.

Now that must have taken a long, long time when you think of how many animal species there are on earth. (This, by the way, is one of the reasons why I don’t think that the days of creation were literal 24 hour days. The naming of the animals was just one of several profound things that happened on the sixth day.)

But as he studied all these animals, Adam could not have failed to notice that they were in pairs. There was male and there was female. And he must have observed that they shared their responsibilities and they divided their labor and they looked after each other.

And I’m sure that all this time, there was growing in his own heart an increasing recognition that there was no partner like that for him. And I believe that God wanted Adam to realize that. God was fostering his desire for a companion thru this process.

You know, when God puts a legitimate desire in our hearts, he often leads us through a process of fostering that desire. It’s a time when the burden grows, but the answer doesn’t show. And we find ourselves wondering if God will ever answer our prayers.

Why does God do this? To deepen our faith. To teach us to wait on Him. You see, faith cannot grow if all our needs are being met instantly. The flower of faith grows best in the soil of patience.

In verses 19-20, God was fostering and cultivating Adam’s desire for a companion so that when Eve appeared, Adam could fully appreciate what God had done. Let’s look at verse 21…

Genesis 2:21 So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and closed up the place with flesh.

Why is it significant that God put Adam to sleep? Two things:

1. Activity—Adam wasn’t called upon to do anything in his own power to solve this problem. The problem was solved while he slept, and it was all God’s doing.

2. Awareness—Adam wasn’t even aware that God was working on the problem because he was asleep.

There is a tremendous lesson here for those of you who are single and thinking about marriage. God knows that you are alone. God knows that you yearn to have a life companion. Perhaps He has been putting you thru the process of fostering that desire in your life.

The question is: Are you willing to wait on God to bring that special someone into your life? Or are you going to try impatiently to make it happen on your own?

Many Christian young people have said “I want to get married. And I don’t seem to be able to find anyone attractive or appealing here in the church, so I’m going to start looking outside the church.” And before you know it they find themselves involved in a marriage relationship with an unbeliever. Moving in two opposite directions.

Some of you may be discouraged by the lack of eligible partners. But if you want to talk about an unpromising situation for finding a mate, think about Adam. He was the only person on earth! Women didn’t even exist when he was in the market for marriage!

Just be at peace, and turn it all over to God. Go to sleep in the will of God and he’ll take care of that whole area of your life. Wait for the one of his choosing. And when God brings that person to you, believe me, you’ll know!

Just last weekend, I had the privilege of conducting the wedding of my niece in Montreal. Verna is a very beautiful young woman, talented, lots of athletic ability and a great personality. But most significantly, she is a committed follower of Jesus Christ. And as such, she was determined to wait for God’s choice for her marriage partner.

She waited and she waited and she waited. And nothing happened. Most of her friends got married, and she was in their weddings. But there didn’t seem to be any wedding bells ringing for her. So what did she do? She got on with her life. She kept serving the Lord.

Verna had a chance to go to Australia and spend a year working at a Christian youth ranch just outside of Sydney. Unbeknownst to her, God’s choice for her husband was serving there on staff. Grant, too, had just been waiting on the Lord’s choice to come along. And one day, this beautiful Canadian girl showed up from 12,000 miles away.

And the rest is history.

Someone has said that God created Adam and then he looked at him and said “I think I can do better.” so he created Eve. If Adam was dust refined, Eve was dust double-refined. She was one step removed from the dust of the earth. She was the crowning act of God’s creation.

Why did God create Eve this way? Why didn’t God just go and get some more dust and form it into a woman and breathe into her nostrils the breath of life?

Well, he did it this way to show us that woman is of the very same essence as man. They are really of one substance - they don’t have two separate origins. Adam recognized this immediately when God brought Eve to him. He said

She is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”

That’s the very first poetry in human history. Adam recognized that Eve was part of himself. She shared his body, his soul, his spirit. The breath of life that was in her was the breath of life that was in him.

Have you ever wondered why God used a rib to make Eve? I think that no one has explained this better than Matthew Henry, a great Welsh man of God who lived in the eighteenth century. He said…

Eve was not made out of Adam’s head to rule over him,

nor out of his feet to be trampled upon by him,

but out of his side to be equal with him,

under his arm to be protected,

and near to his heart to be beloved.

We don’t need the feminist movement to tell us that women are equal to men - we already know that. The Bible tells us that on the second page. Adam and Eve are of one essence and one substance. Please look at one more verse…

Genesis 2:24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

This is the Biblical basis of marriage. I want you to notice the order of events presented in that verse. The leaving of parents precedes the uniting in a one flesh relationship.

In other words, the marriage ceremony must take place before the man and woman enter into the one flesh relationship. A lot of couples want to do it the other way around these days. They want the sex before the marriage commitment. But sex that occurs outside of marital commitment is a very dangerous and damaging thing.

Sex is a lot like fire. In its proper place, fire is good - it warms our homes, it cooks our food. But if fire gets out of its proper place, it destroys us. The same is true of sex. God designed sex for marriage. In that context, sex is good. Outside of that context, sex is very harmful.

Genesis 2:25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.

There was total trust, total openness, total intimacy between Adam and Eve. But it didn’t stay that way. And that’s what we’re going to look at next week.

But let’s remember what we have learned today. Adam had a need, a desire, a yearning for a companion. God foresaw that desire; he fostered that desire, and ultimately he fulfilled that desire by creating Eve to be his wife.

This teaches us that God knows our needs. He is aware of what we need to be happy, what we need to be at peace. And he wants to provide for our needs. But he wants to do it in His good time and His perfect way. And our job is to wait on Him and trust Him to do that.